What exactly are “strong men”?

Strength/endurance, self-confidence, assertiveness: attributes commonly associated with strong men. Love, sensitivity, and patience should also be present. So, ideally, all of them? An attempt at clarification.

All good things come in threes, even if the saying has been around for many years:

1. What strong men probably aren't 

A failed artist from Braunau am Inn , 6 million Jews killed. That's one way to look at World War II, 1939-1945. The man became known as Adolf Hitler. In 1905 he dropped out of secondary school in Steyr, Upper Austria. In 1906 he wanted to become a painter - and later called himself that. In 1907 he applied unsuccessfully to study at the General School of Painting at the Vienna Academy of Fine Arts. He saw himself as an unrecognized artist all his life. At least his three roommates (all Jews) in the men's dormitory were able to sell some of his paintings . One of them would later describe him as "weak, ill-fed, hollow-cheeked (...) and shabbily dressed." Hitler, a strong man? Hardly. But certainly a powerful one. From 1933 to 1945, he was dictator and ultimately the destroyer of the German Reich.

“If you think strong men are dangerous, look at what weak men are capable of” (Prof. Jordan Peterson, psychologist)

His strengths: charismatic oratory . Manipulative leadership. Strategic planning (apart from the disastrous Russian campaign).

Lies, manipulation, and deception thus seem to confer power , even when they come from a slight little man with a conspicuously trimmed mustache who had an inferiority complex. Humanity, however, benefited little from Hitler's achievements. The Second World War claimed approximately 75 million lives (at that time, 3.5% of the world's population).

2. What strong men could be 

27 years in prison for his clear rejection of racial discrimination. Four years later, he served for three years as South Africa's first black president. Transforming the country away from apartheid and minority rule: The story of Nelson Mandela .

Unwavering integrity, resilience/perseverance, communication skills and empathy were considered among his greatest strengths.

Clearly a "strong man," not only in his own right, but also in terms of his contribution to society. Teamwork and cooperation are often referred to as attributes of strong men—because they facilitate group leadership—and thus human cooperation. In 1993, Mandela received the Nobel Peace Prize for his achievements.

"It ain't about how hard you get hit. It's about how hard you can get hit... and keep moving forward," is the popular culture's take on this. A quote from the film Rocky Balboa (2006), spoken by the aging "Rocky" himself to his son , who is loudly complaining about life's adversities.

Falling down and getting back up again. Being a good father who wants to pass on something valuable to his son. These are also undoubtedly characteristics of "strong men."

3. And now it’s about violence – so it’s getting tricky 

Evidently, weak men are very willing to use violence (in Hitler's case, it was more of a case of " letting it happen ") – the strong men, on the other hand, sit their butts off in prison and are still very peaceful and forgiving even afterwards.

There must be something fishy going on, because hardly anyone could have gotten to Adolf Hitler with a “non-violent communication” course.

In 1944, Colonel Claus Schenk Graf von Stauffenberg tried "blowing up his ass" instead , a truly powerful idea. However, this assassination attempt ("Operation Valkyrie") was thwarted, or rather, failed in its implementation (plastic explosives and remote detonators were still a thing of the future). Hitler suffered only bruises, burns, and a ruptured eardrum. Stauffenberg and his comrades were captured shortly afterwards and executed under court order.

So, what is the solution for strong men (or women) to put weak men in their place? Mathematical game theory has a proven answer:

1. Cooperate peacefully with your environment
2. In case of aggression or cheating, offer the opponent cooperation
3. If cooperation is refused, react with harshness/retaliation (ADHD offers advantages here because it also means a relatively short fuse )

In fact, "artificial intelligences" were encouraged to "play/negotiate with each other" using these – and other, different – ​​rules. They played countless rounds, after which it was determined how much of the initially created "social system" remained. The result showed that the system performed best when the rule " tit for tat " was adhered to. In a system that was just beginning to cooperate, the response to non-cooperation would therefore also be uncooperative. Cheating would be immediately followed by retaliation.

Especially in a social context, however, a somewhat milder approach is appropriate. In schools, at work, and in relationships, a balance can also be achieved if the above "co-op-co-op fight" rule is observed.

What can this mean for bullying your child at school if you, as a parent, are asked to advise them?

1. Treat your friends well
2. Respond to the bullying with a clear no and a peace offer
3. Use what you learned in your karate class, in Krav Maga (…). And aim well.

Is violence (physical, verbal) a possible solution to conflicts? Yes, absolutely. But it's never the first option. And—best for the system—not the third option either, because options 1 and 2 have worked before.

Conclusion: Strong men are not – they will 

Even strong men were once weak boys. Needy, even helpless children. Ideally, they learned from strong women and men that you don't get far with lies, manipulation, and deceit. Perhaps they also learned this over the course of their lives—usually especially through hard, unpleasant experiences , such as suffering, falling, and getting back up again.

Strong fathers and mothers make an important, if not THE most important, contribution to strengths such as integrity, resilience , communication skills, and empathy. Formative life experiences, good friends, and personal development can complete the picture. But, as we all know, you never stop learning.

Speaking of pictures: Below is one of the pictures of Adolf Hitler . It's not THAT bad, is it?

If only the man had simply been allowed to go to the Vienna Academy of Fine Arts…

PS: Yes, Professor Jordan Peterson can be annoying, too. Whether he's comparing our search for a partner to the biology of lobsters or once again having a crying fit on camera while sharing something purely personal about his life. The quote above fits the text perfectly, though.

PPS: Crying men are usually the strongest men. Those who can cry show that something is very important to them (and you can't move mountains with men who don't give a damn about anything). But Prof. Peterson seems to especially enjoy crying for the camera.